Ammar Alim

Ammar Alim

Tinkerer - AI/ML for security

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Articles by Ammar Alim

Teams Left Confused and Disappointed by New “Shift Left” Fitness Program
Nov 11, 2025•

Teams Left Confused and Disappointed by New “Shift Left” Fitness Program

Engineers at Nimbus Cloud mistook their CISO's "Shift Left" announcement for a corporate wellness program, only to discover it meant integrating security earlier in development instead of getting gym memberships. The confusion escalated when the security team introduced "Threat Yoga Thursdays" and deployed an AI coach that refused to merge code until developers "believed in themselves." At press time, morale had split between those embracing "pipeline core training" and a resistance group plotting to reclaim their weekends.

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